The Decision to Divorce: A Guilford Divorce Lawyer's Perspective
There are not many decisions in life that compare with getting a divorce. It marks the end of a commitment you once made - living with the person you loved till death do you part.
If you were lucky enough to have children as a result of the marriage, a divorce means breaking apart what they know as family. So, like other permanent and life-changing decisions, you shouldn’t decide to divorce without proper consideration.
This guide highlights some important considerations you may want to consider when deciding to divorce.
Consider Alternatives
Considering the nature of a divorce, you do not want to rush into it. Reality doesn't sink in until after the divorce, and it is common to find people who regret their decision. Before you rush to get a divorce, be sure it is what you want for yourself and that it's based on the right reasons.
Connecticut laws dictate a mandatory 90-day separation period for most marriages. The separation period provides the perfect window for thinking through your decision.
Open communication is critical in this phase. Make efforts to communicate your feelings with your soon-to-be ex-partner. If both of you want to save the marriage, you may reach a consensus by making compromises.
Seek Professional Assistance
When navigating a potential divorce, it's okay to accept your vulnerabilities and get a professional's help. As a bare minimum, seek the advice of a divorce lawyer.
Besides a lawyer, consider talking to a therapist if you have problems coping. In addition to upholding your mental health, a therapist can guide you in decision-making.
If you have sizable wealth, you may also want to talk to financial experts to understand how your divorce will impact your financial situation.
Steer Clear of Emotional Decision-Making
By the time you consider divorce, there must be cracks in what was once a thriving love relationship. These cracks often result from betrayal, dishonesty, or shattered expectations, all of which can leave you with emotional scars.
Emotions and decision-making don't go together, and they are the main cause of protracted divorce cases that do not yield any good. For example, a spouse who has been cheated on may want to muddy the waters to make the cheating spouse suffer.
The problem is, as you fight to see them suffer, you suffer with them in terms of cost and emotional distress. Letting go of emotions and focusing on what gets you the best outcomes is the best way.
Careful Who You Listen To
Family, friends, and colleagues can provide a shoulder to lean on during divorce. Besides offering their shoulder, they may also offer advice on your situation based on their experiences or the experiences of people they know.
You could learn a thing or two from them. But it is best to take the advice with a pinch of salt. While they mean well and want the best for you, they are not experts in divorce.
The best approach is to implement the advice you get from your legal counsel. If you feel any advice is worth considering, let your pass it through your lawyer before implementing. Every case is unique, requiring a different approach.
Final Words
“Divorce is a major step, and a decision to get one should be well thought out,” says Guilford divorce attorney Matthew F. Dolan of Dolan Divorce Lawyers, PLLC.
The considerations highlighted in this guide are among the most important, but you may still need legal advice from a divorce lawyer.
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